What is the difference between hope and an expectation? Expectation is founded in ego and Hope is a product of Humility.
Long ago, without even knowing it, I started building my masks as a matter of survival. It was a result of me having the ability to read people, and situations, and then showing you the mask I thought would best serve me in the moment so I could get by. It worked pretty well too. The problem was that it worked well enough that I adopted it as a valuable skill set. When I was aware of myself acting this way, it seemed like it was working but upon consideration now, somewhere along the way, I forgot who I really was. Actually, I didn’t want to remember. No, I couldn’t show the world any aspect of the real me because the world surely wouldn’t like me, because I didn’t like me. So I kept the appropriate mask on for as long as possible; Hiding the hideous monster that I believed was within. The trouble was that the characters I portrayed became a dominate part of me. So many masks were worn that I was virtually a troop of entertainers. The freak I believed that I was actually became a self fulfilling prophecy. I was feeling worthless due to misjudging my value in the first place.
The trouble was that I could never feel like I fit in without wearing a costume, and performing some kind of act. It wasn’t until my inventory was shared that I realized that, and the consequences of being that way too. Now I have a choice to believe that I am acceptable just being myself. I can now be alone, or with others, and be at peace.
There is no denying that this step is humbling. It produces an understanding of who we really are, and is the first action step toward becoming who we may just really be. This new found humility is the beginning of removing the need for the barriers that we have built up over the years to protect ourselves from being hurt. And as we develop genuine humility, then our self-esteem becomes more and more unshakable.
You really do have the power to turn your wounds and worries into wisdom; you just have to do something about them! So perhaps your worst battle has been between what you know and what you feel. If that’s true, you have to accept what has happened and use what you’ve learned to step forward. Knowing, recognizing and accepting your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darkness’s of other people. So everything you’ve ever experienced has given you what’s needed for dealing with everything you have yet to experience! Realize this and you will have begun to set yourself free.